Dear Ex-Best Friend
I've had this on my chest for almost 3 years. Everytime I try to forget you, I can't. It's too hard to give up the one person who I thought actually gave a shit. So why do I keep going back to remembering you always being there for me? You treated me like shit. Whenever it was just me and you, you always cared. You were always good to me and I actually really considered you almost like family. But then you changed. Something changed in you after you ran way for the first time. You weren't my best friend anymore. Then you came back with a new boyfriend. I didn't care because I'm not the type that looks for attention. But I was the type that needed a friend to always be there. And the times I needed one, you were no where to be found and it hurt a whole lot to realize that I was alone in the world and that even the one person I considered to be my other half wasn't anywhere to be found. How could you just leave me like that? After awhile everytime I did see you, it was never just me and you anymore. You always brought around whatever boyfriend you were dating at the time and I just couldn't deal with that anymore. Whenever someone else was around you turned into a whole different person. Why did you have to change? I liked you just the way you were. Do you realize how hard it was for me to grip the fact that I was losing yet another person in my life? After my parents had gotten into huge fight and divorced, you had been there for me. My dad had been my everything and then I had to get used to the fact that he wouldn't be around anymore. I had lost one person in my life...and then I had to deal with losing you. I hate you for leaving me. I hate that you thought other people were more important than I was. I had been there first! I was always there for you when you needed me to be. I was always there when you wanted to hang out. Why couldn't you do the same for me? I feel like through your mind I wasn't going anywhere. That no matter how much you hurt me, everything was always okay in your eyes. I admit, I played it off as though everything was. But you were suppose to be my best friend..couldn't you see that everything wasn't? In order for me to stop having hope in you changing, I had to stop talking to you and let go. But a real friend wouldn't have let me go, they would've fought for a good thing to fucking last! All you cared about was your fucking boyfriend...so I stopped and so did you. We don't talk anymore and I pretend I don't give a shit that your out of my life for good. But deep down I can't pretend that a day goes by that I don't miss you. There I said, I miss being friends with you because you were the only one that actually understood me. It's too late now. Even though I do miss you, I don't want to talk things over. I don't want to go back to the way things used be with you anymore. I want nothing to do with you. I have nothing but anger towards you now. I can't promise that if we ever cross paths one day I would stop and say hello, because you hurt me too much for you to ever be worth my time. I don't think you understand how bad you really did hurt me. I came to the point were I lost all hope in anyone ever really caring about me and being there for me when I need someone. I hope you have a good life, because all I'm trying to do is live my mine.
Love
A Hurt Friend
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